The Bond
Summary: somewhat (more than somewhat--you
can decide?) weird little alternative-universe
scenario for TPM
Pairing: Q/O, natch
Rating: PG-13 for violence. No real smut to be
found (sorry!) except a little smooching and
touching
Spoilers: yes for TPM
Additional notes: This is written to follow
my earlier story, "Meditations"...though if
you're not keen on AU fics, you can skip this one
and let the previous story stand by itself. I
just had the idea get stuck in my head after
reading up on Jedi talents the other night.
Feedback: always welcome. If any of y'all
actually like this one, I just might continue
with the time line in the future, so let me
know. Though I fear this may be the last fic I have
time to finish before having to get back to work
finishing my thesis, ugh!
Archive: master_apprentice, and my fiction page
(http://members.aol.com/amyaallen/sidewinder.html)
His was the face of pure evil, the Dark Side
incarnate. He fought with no restraints, no
honor, no regard for the corrupting of his spirit
through the dark forces he summoned. There was
nothing left within him to corrupt. He was nothing
but a hate-filled, hollow vessel for the Dark Side.
His only purpose was destruction and revenge.
Obi-Wan Kenobi had never imagined facing such an
enemy. The Sith were the material of history and
legend, an enemy long ago defeated...or so the
Jedi had thought, so he had been taught as a
child. Now, Obi-Wan and his master were caught in
a battle with this remnant of the past--a battle
for their lives, and the lives of those they were
sworn to protect.
He would not let his master down. He would not
let any of them down.
The Force surged through him as he fought, as he
mirrored Qui-Gon's actions, acting in
synchronicity with his master as they had always
done, in every fight before. Yet this one was
different. Their enemy--the Sith--was trying to
use the Dark Side to break his opponents'
concentrations. Obi-Wan felt the cold, sickening
tendrils slithering around them, trying to
constrict and sever the link between master and
padawan, searching for any weakness.
They ran, attacked, blocked deadly blows
repeatedly. He could not stop to think. He could
do nothing but let the Force guide him, act on
instinct, anticipate his opponent's strikes. Yet
he found this to be more difficult with each
passing moment as the Sith's dark power continued
to pummel him and confuse his senses. Had Qui-Gon
ever faced such an enemy before? Obi-Wan
wondered. His training had never prepared him for
such an opponent, but he tried not to give in to
fear. Even so, Obi-Wan could feel the connection
to his master faltering, weakened under the
stress of the attack
He could not lose that connection! His life, and
the lives of so many others, depended upon this
battle.
His moment of fear betrayed him, however; it was
all the darkness had been waiting for. The Sith
lunged at him and he lost touch with his master
with a painful snap in his mind. His sense of
balance disrupted, the next thing he knew he was
stumbling, falling...
...falling...
At the last second he summoned the Force to
soften his landing on the deck below. What should
have been a bone-shattering impact left him
merely dazed, and he quickly rose to his feet,
determined to rejoin the battle...determined not
to let his master down. He looked upward and
sought out Qui-Gon and his opponent, seeing
them continue the fight above him. He leapt up to
rejoin them, propelled by the Force and by his
need to aide Qui-Gon. His master needed him.
The elder Jedi was a strong fighter but this challenge
was too great to let him face it on his own. Obi-
Wan raced after the two of them, reaching out for
his master mentally, trying to reconnect.
I'm coming, master...
He ran after them, but his feet could not propel
him forward fast enough. A split-second too late,
the barriers hummed to life, separating him from
the others.
No! he screamed silently in frustration. Dammit,
no!
Only one barrier separated the Sith from Qui-Gon,
but many more stood between Obi-Wan and his
master. Looking toward the dark figure, pacing
like a caged animal and sneering at the two Jedi,
Obi-Wan knew this had all been his plan.
Separate us...then take us on one by one...oh,
master, please, be careful...wait for me...
Obi-Wan could not even reach his master mentally.
The Sith was blocking him, and Qui-Gon was deep
in meditation--waiting, calm, while Obi-Wan's
patience was stretched beyond its limits until he
thought he would go mad.
The barriers cycled open and Qui-Gon leapt at the
Sith. Obi-Wan raced forward yet was stopped at
the last barrier, unable to do anything but
watch. Qui-Gon fought with a ferocity Obi-Wan had
never seen before, but still the padawan could
see that alone, his master could not match the
Sith's fury. Obi-Wan struggled in vain to use the
Force to open the last barrier, yet it would not
yield. He was not strong enough to open it.
He gasped and looked on in horror as the Sith
struck Qui-Gon on the chin, catching the Jedi
off-guard. But it was nothing compared to the
horror that then unfolded before Obi-Wan's eyes.
"NO!"
The scream was ripped from his throat as he
watched his master fall to the ground, his life-
force fading away as the Sith stood over his body
in triumph.
"Obi-Wan...Obi-Wan!"
Still screaming, the padawan was shaken awake,
though his mind refused to let go of the image of
his master's death.
"Obi-Wan, calm yourself! It was only a dream."
A dream? Confused, disoriented, Obi-Wan blinked
and tried to slow his racing heartbeat. "A
dream...master...?"
In the darkness of their chambers, the lights
dimmed for sleep, he was still able to see Qui-
Gon's face just a few inches from his own. The
elder Jedi's eyes were filled with concern. His
touch was enough to make Obi-Wan shudder...
...As if I am being touched by a ghost.
"Padawan. It is only me," Qui-Gon offered.
"Relax, let it go. The dream is over."
"Oh, master..." Relief flooded through Obi-Wan.
He drew himself tightly against the other man's
body, needing to feel the comfort of his
presence, desperate to reassure himself that his
master was alive. "Master..."
He could not shake the chill that had taken hold
of his heart, the touch of the Dark Side that he
had felt so strongly in his dream...his vision.
He knew that was what it had been: a vision of
the future.
"It wasn't a dream. It was prophecy," Obi-Wan
spoke in a hushed voice. "I have seen the
future...what awaits us on Naboo."
"Do not rush to judgement, Obi-Wan; the future is
a delicate thing. Visions can simply be a sign of
the fears we must acknowledge, and then let go."
"I know, I understand that well enough. But
this...it was too real. Too clear. I have seen
glimpses, shades of future events before, but
nothing like this. Never with such clarity." He
paused, taking a few moments to try to clear his
head. He took solace in Qui-Gon's embrace, the
calm he radiated, which helped soothe the young
Jedi's anxiety. Qui-Gon waited patiently, saying
nothing until his padawan was ready to continue.
"Master, I saw...we were fighting the Sith. The
one who attacked you on Tatooine. I felt such
pure evil within him. I have felt the touch of
Dark Side before but never so strong, never so
focused in one individual--as if he were black
hole, determined to absorb all light, to leave
only nothingness."
"Yes. The Dark Side is strong in him. Very
strong," Qui-Gon agreed, and admitted, "I was
rather ill-prepared to meet such a challenge when
we first encountered him."
"We are still ill-prepared to meet him. That is
what I have seen. He will use the Dark Forces to
separate us, and then..."
"Yes?" Qui-Gon prodded gently.
Obi-Wan closed his eyes and once more saw the
lightsaber thrust into his lover's body.
"I watched him kill you, master, as I stood
helpless to stop him, to do anything." He opened
his eyes and continued, "It was not an experience
I wish to repeat. Once, as only a vision, was more
than sufficient."
If Obi-Wan's words surprised his master, Qui-Gon
didn't show it. He merely reached out and brushed
his apprentice's cheek lightly...and in his eyes,
Obi-Wan saw a great sadness.
He knows I speak the truth. He knows this will
happen!
"You have seen this as well," Obi-Wan stated more
than asked, as comprehension dawned. "That is why
I sensed unease in you before...why you allowed
us this...indulgence...while on a mission." Earlier,
Qui-Gon had surprised him by granting them the union
of the flesh, something Qui-Gon normally denied his
apprentice while they were on a mission. It had
struck Obi-Wan as unusual at the time, but he had
not thought to question it. Now, he understood,
although the Jedi master answered him with only a
vague confirmation of his fears.
"I have only sensed that the future
is...uncertain, padawan. However, we must not let
our fears rule us as we go forward tomorrow. We
must have faith in the Force, and let go of our fears."
Obi-Wan clasped the hand still resting against
his cheek, fighting back the desperation
inside him, the tears of grief he felt for a man
who was not yet dead. I'm not ready to lose you!
How can I go through with this mission if I know
it will end in your death? he thought but did
not speak. He had not seen how the battle would
end. He did not know if he too would die at the
hands of the Sith; he only knew that with his
master dead, he would have nothing left to live
for. There had to be a way, some way to keep the
darkness from getting the chance to separate
them...why else would the Force have granted him
this vision of the future?
The answer came to him suddenly. "Master, if the
future is uncertain, I have but one request."
"Yes?"
Obi-Wan drew in a deep breath. "Before we reach
Naboo, I wish to complete the Life Bond with
you."
Qui-Gon's eyes widened; with this statement, at
least, Obi-Wan had surprised him. "Obi-Wan, you
know that I wish nothing more than to share that
bond with you, but now is not the time to take
that final step. Not until after--"
"--after the trials, I know that was what we
agreed. But there will not be time then. If we
do not do it now, I know we will never get the
chance. The Life Bond is the key, our key to
defeating the Sith."
"But you are not ready--"
"I am ready to face the trials, you said so
yourself. Do you doubt I will succeed?"
"No, of course not."
"Then I am ready to take this step now. I have no
doubts. I am certain of my feelings, my
commitment to you. My love. For years now I have
dreamed of the day when the Force could unite us
truly as one. Do you not feel the same for me?"
"Of course I do. My only concern has been
ensuring that you truly wished to take this step,
that you were mature enough to understand all
that it entails. There is no way to sever the
bond once complete--"
"--except through death. I know. I accept this,
for I can think of nothing that I want more in my
life than to be forever at your side. Master," he
implored, sensing Qui-Gon was still doubtful, "I
know I am not as strong in the Force as you are
now. Yet I cannot question the vision I have
seen, and my knowledge that this is the only way
to change the future as I have seen it. We need
the strength of the Life Bond to meet our
opponent and succeed. Will you trust in my
conviction as I have often trusted in yours?"
The master Jedi was silent for some time,
studying his younger lover, his thoughts closed
to him for agonizing minutes. But then relief
flooded Obi-Wan's mind as Qui-Gon nodded his head
gently. "Yes, Obi-Wan, I will. Though promise me
that if we do this, you will not face the future
with fear, only with faith in the will of the
Force. Tell me this and I will complete the Bond
with you tonight."
"I promise. After all, there will be nothing to
fear any more," Obi-Wan answered with a smile,
reaching out to touch his master's face.
Joy filled him, and he leaned in to claim his
Qui-Gon's lips, to kiss him with all the power
of his love and gratitude.
Qui-Gon eventually broke the kiss, and murmured
close to his apprentice's lips, "Then we should
begin now. We may have just enough time before
landing to complete what is necessary and to
allow ourselves time to begin to adjust." Qui-Gon
rose into a meditative position, the blanket
falling away from his naked form. Obi-Wan did the
same, sitting and facing his master, trying to
calm his excitement. This was the moment he had
dreamed of--the one he had waited for more than
passing the trials, more than anything else in
recent years. Perhaps all of his life.
The Life Bond was the highest level of commitment
a Jedi could make to another. It was the complete
union of the Force between two beings that, when
complete, would leave neither whole without the
other. Though separate in body, their spirits
would be united as one, able to share thought and
feeling, able to amplify each other's abilities
as needed. Obi-Wan could think of nothing he
desired more than to share such a union with
Qui-Gon, and he knew that if they could make
this commitment, they would have the strength
to meet the challenge before them. He knew this
as he had never been so certain of anything
before in his life.
"What do I need to do, master. Lead and I will
follow."
"Give me your hands. We will meditate together,
entering the deepest level of communion with the
Force. Beyond that, simply trust me, and do not
be afraid. No matter what you feel, trust that I
am there. I will catch you if you fall...I will
be there to guide you back."
"Of course, master."
Qui-Gon's large, warm hands clasped his own, and
the connection was immediate, powerful. Obi-Wan
closed his eyes and felt the Force flow through
him...between them. He surrendered himself to it,
following Qui-Gon through each deeper level of
meditation, every stage he had mastered over his
years of training. Gradually he lost all sense of
himself in the ebb and flow of energy between
them, until that was all he was aware of--the
energy, the Force...and Qui-Gon. His master. His
lover. His heart, and soon to be his soul.
He was not afraid.
He knew nothing of what would come next. Only a
master such as Qui-Gon possessed the knowledge
and ability to manipulate the Force to complete a
Life Bond. Such knowledge was not revealed to a
padawan because of the danger and risk of
misusing it. He trusted his master completely and
surrendered to his will, to the will of the
Force.
After some time, he heard his master's voice in
his mind.
It is time. Are you certain you wish to do this,
Obi-Wan? Assure me once more.
Yes, Qui-Gon. My master. I love you, and I am
ready.
As am I, my beloved. Where there were two, there
will be only one.
Silence.
Nothingness, like the empty vacuum of space
between galaxies.
Emptiness and peace.
And then...
Light, so bright, blinding, searing his eyes.
Chaos erupted all around him, as fire seared
his body, leaving him in agony.
Infinite, unthinkable pain screamed through him;
he felt as if the Force were tearing him asunder,
ripping him apart, scattering his body and mind
in a thousand different directions at light
speed, scattering him like the stars in the
sky...
QUI-GON! was the last thought he managed,
before the chaos consumed him entirely.
And it was over.
There was no more pain, only a feeling of
falling, of his scattered thoughts and being
coming back together, but in a new pattern.
I will catch you when you fall, Obi-Wan.
A new tapestry of life.
Master?
Yes. I am here.
Entwining with the pieces of another, he felt
himself becoming whole again, creating one where
before there had been two.
Qui-Gon...
Yes, Obi-Wan. Now...It is done.
He opened his eyes, feeling dizzy as the world
came back into focus around him.
He could see Qui-Gon sitting across from him,
just as before. And, at the same time, he could
see himself through his master's eyes, see the
look of wonder on his own face. It was making his
head spin. Exhausted and feeling ill, he
collapsed onto the blanket with a groan.
"Master..."
Shhh, the disorientation will fade, give it
time, Qui-Gon assured him, gathering the young
apprentice's body delicately against his own.
I should hope so, and that the time will pass
quickly. Being in two places at once is
rather...confusing.
You will adjust. Center yourself back into your
body, you can do it. Just relax, and let the
Force guide you there.
He followed his master's instructions, and then
sighed in relief as he felt his sense of balance
return. His head was still buzzing, and he could
still feel the Bond between them like a new
sense. Thankfully, though, he no longer was
feeling so nauseous.
"Better, now, yes?"
"Yes. Although you could have warned me a little
better about what to expect. It rather felt as
if I were dying, and in a most unpleasant
fashion."
"In a way it is dying. Dying and rebirth." Qui-
Gon's lips brushed his ear, his neck, his gentle
kisses spreading reassuring warmth through Obi-
Wan's body. Now, we really must try to rest,
padawan. Give the Force time to complete the
Bond.
"Yes, master." Thank you, for this gift.
No, my beloved. Thank you for wishing to share
yourself with me. You bring me such happiness;
you complete me. We will shape the future
together, Obi-Wan.
Yes, we will... the young Jedi thought back,
before surrendering himself to his body's need
for rest.
Nothing would stand between them now.
They moved and struck against the enemy as one.
The dark power of the Sith thrashed against the
Jedis' senses, trying to fight their bond even as
he struck at them individually with his
lightsaber. Yet now, unlike in the dream, Obi-Wan
fought with no fear. No desperation. All he felt
was the calm certainty that they would win. The
power of the Light Side coursed through his body
and his master's, uniting them, driving them to
act in perfect unison. There was no thought, only
feeling. No struggle to maintain their Bond, no
chance for their enemy to break what had been
forged by the Force and their love.
When he had awoken after the bonding, he had felt
a strength such as he'd never before imagined. He
could reach out at any moment and share in Qui-
Gon's thoughts and feelings. The closeness, which
before they only could reach at the height of
passion, now filled him without effort. Now, as
they fought, that closeness ensured their success
against the solitary foe. When Obi-Wan would
begin to falter, within a heartbeat he could feel
Qui-Gon's strength surge through him, bolstering
his efforts. When he sensed his master close to
making the slightest misstep, he would lash forth
and divert the Sith's attention, or propel his
master to correct his movements.
Back and forth, the Force resonated between them.
Leap. Spin. Strike. Defend. Move. Protect.
Every movement on instinct, every act by the will
of the Force.
The Sith's mask of rage did not frighten Obi-Wan.
His anger and hatred could not cloud the Jedi's
mind. The darkness could not touch him, could not
cause fear to take hold. Thoughts of his nightmarish
vision were now far behind him, because he knew he and
Qui-Gon had changed the course of Fate this day.
The Dark Side would not have a victory, not even
a partial one.
Pain shot through his arm--the Sith had managed
to land a glancing blow on Qui-Gon, and the pain
echoed through the padawan's body. He summoned
the Force to give his master the strength to
ignore the pain, to continue the fight.
Thank you... the thought flashed through his
mind.
Not your time, master. Not this time, he
answered as he charged against the Sith not
with rage but with his senses afire with the Force.
His opponent was strong, but not ready, alone, to
meet their combined strength. Eventually, the
Sith made a small misstep, his foot landing only
partly on the edge of the narrow platform above
the power core. Without hesitation Obi-Wan struck
forward--and in an instant, found his lightsaber
buried deep into the dark warrior's chest. Fiery
eyes blazed into his for a moment, and then the
wounded Sith fell backwards, tumbling off the
platform.
Obi-Wan watched the Sith fall, until the body was
swallowed by the black heart of the pit. Qui-
Gon's hand rested upon his shoulder, as his eyes
traveled the same path.
They stood in silence until Obi-Wan finally felt
the tinge of pain in his left arm again and
observed, "Your arm..."
"Not serious. We can tend to it later."
Obi-Wan could not lift his eyes yet from the pit
below them. "I feel no triumph in his death."
"You fought not out of rage, but in defense.
Killing is never easy for one who follows the
Light, nor should it ever be. Yet sometimes, it
is necessary." Qui-Gon squeezed his shoulder, and
Obi-Wan felt a wave of affection from his master.
You have made me proud. You will be a great
Jedi, Obi-Wan, greater than I, someday.
But only because of you, master. And never
without you with me. Obi-Wan tried to reach out
and feel any tremor in the Force, any indication
that their dark foe was dead. But he could feel
nothing. "I want to believe we will not see this
one ever again, that he truly is dead. Yet why do
I sense that this fight is not over?"
"I share your suspicions. The struggle against
the Dark Side is eternal. Until the Force can be
united, this battle will never be finished." He
heard Qui-Gon let out a sigh, and then the master
said, "Come, Obi-Wan, it is time to ensure our
allies meet with success and have captured the
Viceroy. We must make sure Anakin is still safe."
"Yes, of course." The boy...he would accept his
master's dedication to training this one. He
knew there was no way Anakin could come
between them now. He would even help his master
instruct the child, even if the council opposed
them both.
Obi-Wan turned away from the pit and toward
Qui-Gon...his other half. We will battle
the darkness together. Always.
Yes, always. Together.
The two Jedi smiled, sharing knowledge of a
future that was now theirs to create. And as one,
they ran and hurried to rejoin the fight.
End
5/30/99