::Insert generic fan-fiction disclaimer here::
Well, all these bad boys stirring up trouble on the list lately sure got
my mind working overtime this week. Here's another little misadventure in
my "Love's Sweet Revenge"/"A Little is Enough" storyline. It's not
exactly where I originally thought I'd be going with these fellas, and I
have a feeling Joxer's gonna be pretty pissed at me after this, but I'm
gonna blame it all on those bad, bad boys...
Feedback welcome. There be slash ahead, and, like, NC-17 rated
hanky-panky. D'uh. But you wouldn't be here if you didn't go for that
kind of thing, would you?
Egira wasn't much of a town, just a small seaport and marketplace geared
towards sailors and other travelers making their way down the coastline
towards Corinth. Autolycus found the place positively dreary and dull,
but at least it had one tavern that served surprisingly good ale and
provided better-than-average entertainment. Mariners tended to be a rowdy
and difficult-to-please crowd, and the proprietors of "The Siren's Lair"
seemed well aware of the recipe for satisfying their mostly itinerant,
often disreputable clientele: Good booze, good music, and plenty of good
women. Or at least, easy women, if you had the dinars to spare them for
The King of Thieves wasn't interested beyond simply observing the
establishment's best girls, who were dancing--if you could really call it
that--on the Lair's stage, while he slowly sipped his way through his
third ale of the night. He still had a few days to kill before heading up
the coast to Egio, where he would be meeting with Joxer just in time to
catch the start of the city's annual arts festival. Joxer wanted to go
because he was interested in the hearing the legendary musicians who were
promised to attend; Autolycus liked festivals because they were generally
perfect opportunities for earning (okay, stealing...) lots of easy
money. And he was never one to turn up his nose when it came to a chance
for making a quick profit.
A half-moon ago, the two men had parted ways for a while to take care of
some respective personal affairs. Autolycus had a client in need of his
larcenous skills in a town a few days' travel to the south, while Joxer
had decided to take a trip home to check on his mother. He hadn't seen
her in a few years and he was worried how she was holding up with both
her husband and now her son Jett in prison. Autolycus wasn't particularly
keen on meeting up with any more of Joxer's infamous relatives, so he'd
been quite happy to let his companion take off on his own for the
journey. It also meant one less thing he had to worry about while he took
care of his own business.
The job had proven to be quite profitable and also much easier than
expected. Auto smiled a little to himself as he thought about how he'd
breezed through the robbery, recovering an ancient artifact for a private
collector with few scruples but a healthy budget for objects d'art.
Maybe trying to work with Joxer for a while was good for me after all,
he pondered. I started getting used to operating under so much adversity
when he was underfoot that working solo again seems like a breeze!
Still, having finished his business much faster than expected, he ended
up having several more days to kill before catching up with Joxer and he
was starting to miss him rather intensely. It hadn't been too bad when
he'd been busy planning his heist, but now...now he was bored, restless,
and he just couldn't keep from thinking about all the things he wanted to
do soon as they were together again. It was the first time they'd been
apart for any extended period of time since...well, since that meeting in
Arta. Since Aphrodite had gone messing with his head, and even when she'd
finished with him he hadn't been able to get the hapless wannabe-warrior
off his mind. He still wasn't sure if he should curse the goddess or
thank her for the turn his life had taken since then. His opinion on that
matter tended to fluctuate on a nearly daily basis.
He didn't like it that he should start feeling so out of sorts and
depressed just because he hadn't been with Joxer for a few nights (a
few? Try fifteen to be exact. I can't believe I'm so strung out I've
been counting down every night until the festival...) Love was an
addiction to be sure, one he'd successfully avoided falling into all his
life until now. He had it so bad he even had a hard time sleeping
without Joxer with him, without the comforting warmth of that
most-desired body curled up against his own.
His aggravating insomnia was what had led him into this establishment
late this evening. He had been too restless to even put up a pretense of
trying to go to sleep after paying for a room at the inn down the street
and grabbing a quick dinner. He'd hoped that maybe he could distract
himself from thinking about Joxer by thinking about the scantily clad and
rather comely ladies wiggling and strutting and stripping before him on
stage. It sort of was doing the trick, as the women were certainly easy
on the eyes and he knew he could easily have any of them with a little
effort, if he wanted. But that was the problem--he didn't want any of
them. He only wanted Joxer. He'd start to try to fantasize about taking
one of the girls back to his room, and before getting much past removing
what was left of her clothes...she'd suddenly morph into Joxer right
before his struggling mind's eye. It was a most unsettling phenomenon.
Yeah, he had it bad. Joxer was the best thing and the worst thing that
had ever happened to him, all rolled into one. It wasn't that he'd
actually developed a set of high ideals about not stepping out on someone
he was involved with for an easy lay here and there. It was just that it
was so good with Joxer, he didn't even want it with anyone else!
Well, except maybe Cleo, if she ever passed through my life
again...Damn but that woman was incredible. Kinky like nobody's business.
I bet if there were some way I could get her and me and Jox together
That most intriguing thought was rudely interrupt when suddenly a hand
grabbed him by the collar of his expensive tunic, jerking him up out of
his chair and rather unceremoniously yanking him to his feet. "Hey!
What's the--" he started angrily, until the hand turned him around and he
recognized its owner. Of all the unexpected surprises..."Joxer!"
Joxer didn't look particularly pleased to see Autolycus here, but he
didn't say anything. He just kept glaring at the thief in an
uncharacteristically menacing way. Auto realized that even if he hadn't
been interested in banging any of the girls in this place, it probably
didn't look that way to Joxer. His rather alcohol-dulled mind struggled
to find a quick way of talking himself out of trouble. "Aw, c'mon babe, I
wasn't doin' anything but...admiring the scenery! What's the crime there?
Cool out and lay off the collar, all right?"
Joxer seemed to consider this for an uncomfortably long moment, then he
finally released the thief. Straightening himself and his tunic out,
Autolycus said, "There, that's better. How'd you find me here anyway?"
"Guess it's...just my lucky night," Joxer answered with a slight smile.
Auto grinned back, his spirits definitely lifting at the prospect of not
having to spend another night alone. "You 'n me both. I thought you'd
still be a few more days with your mom before heading up towards Egio."
"Oh. Well, you know how it goes, visiting family and all." Joxer paused
and shrugged indifferently. "Didn't want to overstay my welcome."
"Let me guess, the new outfit's a present from mom, right? Although I
can't say that I don't approve of the look myself." The all-leather,
tight-fitting sleeveless vest and matching leather pants did a very nice
job indeed of showing off Joxer's...assets...as Autolycus liked to put
it. He reclaimed his chair and grabbed Joxer's arm, urging him to sit in
the neighboring seat. He ordered an ale for Joxer and another for himself
to celebrate. Things were certainly looking up for the evening now.
"You're awfully quiet," Auto prompted his normally garrulous companion
when he didn't immediately jump in with a barrage of questions about the
past days' activities, nor did he seem particularly inclined to talk
about his own trip home. Autolycus frowned and slid his hand down under
the table to rest it against Joxer's thigh. "You okay, Jox? Listen, I
meant it, what I said before. I wasn't gonna go screw around with any of
these girls behind you're back, I swear. I was just feeling a
little...lonely, I guess, without you around. And in this lousy excuse
for a town, this is about the only place to go for a little fun."
"I'm fine, Autolycus. Been a long day on the road. And visiting home
always...puts me on edge," Joxer explained. "Give me a little time to
Autolycus supposed he should have figured as much; from what he'd heard
about Joxer's family he was surprised that the young man had wanted to
spend any time at home these days. Well, he'd take care of putting
Joxer in a better mood once they were alone..."Let's finish these drinks,
then we'll clear out of here. I've got a room down the street at the inn.
It's no palace but..." he paused gave his companion a quick wink, "it'll
do just fine, if you know what I mean."
The musicians picked up the volume and the tempo and the girls started
gyrating with increased fervor, so the two men settled back to enjoy the
end of the performance. Between the rich ales and having Joxer back at
his side, Autolycus was feeling damn good and looking forward to a long
night of getting "reacquainted" with his well-missed friend. His one
hand, which had remained on Joxer's thigh, crept a little further up to
rub against the man's groin. Joxer jerked up in his chair and glowered at
Auto for a moment, but then he started to relax--at least his overall
demeanor did. After a few minutes of sly coaxing under the table, the
part of his body right under Autolycus' hand was starting to feel
anything but relaxed.
As the musicians finished this last song and the ladies started running
off stage, Joxer slugged back the last of his ale and stood up. "Let's
get out of here."
"Thought you'd never ask." Auto tossed a few coins on the tabletop and
followed Joxer out towards the door.
The streets were quiet and mostly empty and it didn't take them long to
make their way to the small inn. The watchman in the entry nodded in
recognition at Autolycus as he entered, though the stocky guard's eyes
lingered on Joxer with obvious disapproval as the two headed up the
stairs leading to the guestrooms.
Wonder what his problem is, Auto grumbled to himself, thinking maybe
Joxer's bad-boy outfit was perhaps a little too effective. Still, he
wasn't about to argue with the great view it granted him on the way up
the stairs, walking right behind him. "It's the second room on your
right," Auto indicated. Joxer waited as Auto pulled out the key, unlocked
the door, and then stepped inside. Light from torches along the
waterfront and the nearly full moon cast soft illumination into the room
through the large window. The room wasn't much, but the bed was large,
the sheets were clean...and what else really mattered beyond that?
As soon as Joxer stepped in and closed the door, Auto turned around and
pinned him to the wall, kissing him with far too many days' worth of
pent-up desire. It felt wonderful, touching him, kissing him, holding him
close, after only doing so in his dreams for too long. Joxer seemed
momentarily taken aback by Auto's extreme enthusiasm, but he then began
to respond, pulling the thief's body tightly against his own. And there
was no denying their mutual states of arousal when standing this close.
"Oh yeah..." Auto ran his hands along the leather-clad body of his lover.
"I sure missed you, baby. And you look so hot in this outfit..."
"Tell me something I don't know," Joxer taunted him, grabbing Auto by
the back of the head and kissing him savagely, sucking his bottom lip
into his mouth and teasing it with his expert tongue. Auto wished that he
hadn't had so much to drink earlier; he was finding it hard enough
keeping his balance without Joxer kissing him like that, sending his
senses into overload. Joxer's touch felt harsher than usual, almost too
demanding and rough. Auto wondered whether it was some new bedroom game
he was trying out tonight--an attitude to match the outfit--or whether
their extended separation had gotten to Joxer even worse than it had to
him. Still, wherever Joxer was concerned, Autolycus was willing to play
things out and see what his lover had in mind. After all, he never failed
"Something you don't know, huh?" Auto said, hands working as best they
could to figure out how to remove the snug vest that was keeping him from
fully savoring his lover's body. "How about this: I'm so crazy about you
that all those girls down the street didn't do nothin' for me. All I
could keep thinking about was you...wanting to be with you again...making
love to you...and...and...godsdammit, help me get you out of this thing!"
Auto exclaimed in frustration.
"Later," Joxer promised, pulling the thief over towards and then onto the
bed. Auto fell back onto the mattress and Joxer landed on top of him so
hard he knocked the wind out of the thief. Keeping the breathless man
pinned beneath his lanky body, Joxer went back to assaulting Auto's lips
with savage kisses, until his mouth finally seemed to grow bored and
found other places on Auto's body to explore.
Joxer smelled enticingly of leather and sweat, with a feint hint of a
spicy soap lingering in the silky dark hair that was tickling Auto's
nose. Even in the cool night air blowing off the water, Autolycus was
growing sticky with sweat from the heat their bodies were generating. He
clutched harshly at the lean body draped over his own, wondering, How is
it I can't get enough of this, enough of him? I'm addicted to this man
and the way he makes me feel. There's got to be something wrong with
Maybe there was, but as Joxer's tongue slinked its way into his ear while
one long-fingered hand slipped down against Auto's groin, the King of
Thieves decided this was not the time to worry about it.
Joxer eventually took a moment's pause in his assault to sit up on his
knees and begin undressing. The soft moonlight streaming in the room
provided just enough light to illuminate the man's dark eyes, which were
gazing down into Auto's with such intense lust that the thief's pulse
quickened a beat. He wished for more light, to be able to see his lover
better as the black vest was finally tossed to the floor, revealing all
that tempting pale flesh he ached to touch. But Joxer remained just out
of easy reach as he moved on his pants, slowly unlacing them, then
sliding them down his hips with such deliberate slowness Auto knew
Joxer was putting on this show just to torment him. But Autolycus was
pleased to note his guess had been right--that there was no way in
Tartarus the man could wear anything underneath pants that tight.
"Your turn," Joxer ordered, sitting back with a leering, come-and-get-it
smile on his face. "Show me what you've got, Autolycus."
With little finesse but much haste, Auto undressed, though his eyes never
left Joxer's the whole time. As soon as he was finished he lunged at the
other man, pushing him down onto the soft mattress to revel in the
feeling of flesh pressing against flesh, softness here contrasting with
delicious hardness there. Joxer's rough passion drove him to return his
own in kind, as Auto kissed him, bit him, worked his body over with a
fervor of need he'd never known before. He felt intoxicated, but no
longer because of the ale. He was drunk on Joxer's love, the taste of his
sweat-coated, incredible body. His tongue traced along familiar paths,
slowly working its way over chest, stomach, and finally pausing to pay
particular attention to the man's groin. His loving efforts there earned
him a growl of approval, as he knew that it would. He gradually
intensified his actions, working up from slow licks to engulfing the
thick shaft with his lips, sucking it down deeply into his throat.
"Enough," Joxer ordered after a few minutes, pulling Auto up by the
shoulders until their lips could meet once more. Then Joxer rolled over,
pinning Autolycus down on the bed, quickly making his intentions clear
about what he intended to do next and wasting very little time preparing
the other man for it. Auto gasped as without any further warning or fuss,
Joxer entered him with hard, quick thrust.
"Oh yeah," Joxer sighed, a smile on his lips as he worked his way in
deeper, "I am definitely going to enjoy this."
Pain blinded Autolycus to any other sensations at first, unaccustomed as
he was to Joxer taking him so harshly, without any apparent concern for
his own comfort and pleasure. But then, oddly enough, Auto realized part
of himself was enjoying this--being used, being abused, letting Joxer
just have his way with him. The sharp edge of the pain slowly dulled and
was replaced with building pleasure and need, each deep, forceful thrust
filling him, fulfilling him in the most agonizingly wonderful way.
"Don't stop..." he managed to moan, his hands clenching the pillow above
his head as Joxer quickened his rhythm. By the gods, don't ever stop!
Then words and even coherent thoughts were impossible and only harsh
breaths and moans escaped his lips. Something inside him could take no
more, reaching the limit of his pleasure threshold and then soaring over
it. He was only dimly aware after that, some minutes later, when Joxer
gave one final, impossibly deep thrust and then collapsed on top of him,
sweaty, panting, and apparently as utterly spent and satisfied as he was.
"Damn..." Auto sighed. "Damn damn damn but you're good when you're
Joxer rolled over next to Auto, keeping one leg possessively draped
across the other man. "Mmm, that was good, wasn't it?"
"If this is what you get like after spending a week at home, guess I'll
have to send you to visit the family more often. But not too often,"
Autolycus added, taking one of Joxer's hands and kissing it. "Miss you
too much when you're gone."
"Is that a fact," Joxer asked, running his hand along Auto's jaw. "Then
how about you quit talking and keep showing me how much you missed me
"What, don't I get a minute to catch my breath?"
"What's the matter, getting too old to keep up with me?" Joxer taunted.
"Oh, you're asking for it, aren't you? Okay, wiseguy, you're gonna regret
that one by the time I'm done with you..." Even as he made the playful
threat, Auto wondered what on Earth either of could ever have to regret
come the morning's light.
Ah, if only he'd known.
As it was, he didn't have the slightest clue.
The dark-haired man stepped out of the inn into the chilly pre-dawn air,
whistling happily to himself as he made his way down along the waterfront
towards the road leading west. The night had certainly turned out
differently than he'd planned, but that was far from misfortunate, all
He'd made his break from prison less than one moon ago and already he'd
tracked down one of those responsible for putting him in that hellhole.
He'd been tracking Autolycus for some time and had finally caught up with
him here in Egira tonight. He'd entered the tavern planning to put a
knife into the bastard's back as soon as he could drag him outside and
into a deserted alley. But curiosity had gotten the better of his thirst
for blood when the thief had so readily mistaken him for his loser
brother Joxer. And when the thief's casual words and not-so casual body
language revealed that he and Joxer had become more than "friends" in the
months that had passed since the Cleopatra fiasco...well, he'd just had
to play along and see if Autolycus would get a clue about who he was
really dealing with before things reached their inevitable...climax. He
hadn't, and as a result Jett had found out that Autolycus was certainly a
better lover than he had ever been a partner in crime.
That revelation had partially kept the thief from a close encounter with
the assassin's blade before Jett left. But when it came right down to it,
Jett did have a few moral codes, especially when it came to family
matters. He wasn't about to kill Autolycus if the do-goody thief meant
anywhere near as much to Joxer as Joxer apparently meant to Autolycus.
His brother was screwed up enough already, Jett figured. Let him enjoy
this little tryst however long it was going to last. Jett concluded he'd
gotten enough revenge for now against Auto through the way tonight's
events would be sure to mess with his mind come the morning.
Jett laughed to himself as he made his way towards the road out of town,
picturing Autolycus trying to figure out where Joxer had gone to when he
woke up. And later, Jett was sure there'd be some interesting goings-on
when Autolycus met up with Joxer again, who would of course be
completely in the dark about their supposed encounter here in Egira.
Would the thief figure out what had actually happened at that point?
Would he realize his error before then? Maybe; Jett didn't think he was
that stupid, that he wouldn't eventually put things together. If
Autolycus hadn't been two sheets to the wind tonight he probably would
have realized his mistake much earlier...And found his fate in the cold,
dark waters off the docks at Jett's hands as a result. No, it was a good
thing indeed for the King of Thieves that he had remained blissfully
ignorant of the true identity of his lover tonight.
Jett was off now to Egio, where he looked forward to keeping an eye on
Joxer and Autolycus and the aftermath of tonight's events. And who knew,
with a little luck and a few answered prayers, they might even lead him
to their good friend Xena at this rate--she was the one with whom Jett
really had a score to settle.
Ah, but it felt good to be free, and to be causing trouble again!
::To be continued... ::
/ One slip, and down the hole we fall, /
/ It seems to take no time at all. /
/ A momentary lapse of reason /
/ That binds a life for life /
/ A small regret, you won't forget. /
/ There'll be no sleep in here tonight /
-- (David Gilmour (c) 1987)