Been There, Never Done That

By Ellie, sidewinder, G. Bonobo and Evil-Lyn





Well, boys and girls, hold onto your hats, here comes a biiiiiig one.

This round-robin started way back when, but grew so huge it took a long
time to proof & edit it. Many thanks to my buddy the Range Ryder who went
through this beastie as our beta-reader. 

Disclaimers: I think we all plead temporary insanity for this. But it was
damn fun! We don't own anyone in this story, we're just letting them have
a little R-and-R.

Archive: only on Joxerotica and the authors' websites; inquire otherwise.

Warnings: definitely NC-17 f/f/m action!

Oh yeah, and feedback always good!

That damn rooster...somehow Xena was convinced it was the rooster's fault, all of it. Sure she'd killed that scrawny bird already to absolutely no effect but there was something in that smug, self important little rooster that made her more certain than ever that it knew something. Little bastard probably remembered everything, just like she did, day after day...or was that same day after same day. Whatever. It was strutting back and forth on the roof now, probably laughing its ass off at her, wondering what new idiocy she'd be dragged into today. She was going to kill it again, there could be no question about that. Yeah it was going to die. Sure it'd be back tomorrow...today...oh to hell with it. But it would feel good, just for a couple of hours to know it was off to poultry Tartarus.

Closing her eyes she counted the seconds, three...two...one...then the barn door creaked open and she prayed as she did every morning that she'd hear something different, just a word...an intonation...anything. Then:

"Rise and shine everyone...Rise and shine!"

The only thing that kept her from putting her Chakram in his chest was the fact that she'd already done it once, and living with Gabrielle for the rest of that day had been nearly unbearable. Sure he annoyed the hell out of the little bard to the point that she was tempted to do him great bodily harm on a fairly regular basis, but she wasn't quite prepared to deal with Xena murdering him. It hadn't helped that the warrior had calmly explained that it really didn't matter, that he'd be fine in the morning, the bard had treated her like a pariah. Speaking of which...."I'll rise," grumbled the sunny-haired lass to her right, "but I refuse to shine."

Joxer paused, just as he always did, with an expression so similar to that of a mutt that used to hang around her mother's tavern in Amphipolis that Xena had to smile. She could never quite bring herself to raise a hand to that dog, no matter how many times it nearly tripped her, or slobbered all over her. Damn but she missed that dog.

Xena tuned out the rest of the conversation, so utterly bored with goose eggs and horseshoes that she nearly screamed. Bored, bored, bored out of her skull and frustrated to nearly the point of homicide, the warrior desperately needed a distraction. Something...different. Something that could really get her juices flowing and snap her brain out of the rut it had tumbled into. Something...

It hit her like one of Zeus' thunderbolts. Oh but it was a bad, wicked, naughty thought. She should be punished for even considering it. And yet, there it was, refusing to drift away back into the dark nether regions from which it had come. 'Come on,' a voice whispered from deep within her, 'what could it possibly hurt?' How could she argue with logic like that? A slow, sensual smile drifted across her face as she planned her attack.

Gabrielle grimaced at Joxer's notion of breakfast and was just about to suggest that she and Xena prowl around the town for something a bit more palatable when she caught sight of her friend's expression. The hairs on the back of her neck were standing at attention almost before her sleep-fuddled brain had even registered the sight. "Uh, Xena..." she began, just the slightest bit concerned.

"Gabrielle..." the dark-haired woman growled, "I'm hungry..."

Joxer, utterly oblivious to any sort of emotional undercurrent in those words, chirped, "Great, 'cause I've got goose eggs and..."

"I'm not...hungry...for goose eggs..."

The bard took a hesitant step back as her friend rose slowly to her feet, blue eyes locked on her emerald ones. There was something downright predatory in that look; it both aroused and terrified her. She heard a slight whimper and wasn't sure whether she or Joxer had made the sound, for both were staring at the warrior as if quite convinced she was about to transform into a Bacchae at any second.

"I...I could, um, you know, go get s-something else..." Joxer stammered, pointing in the vague direction of the door and keeping pace with Gabrielle's retreat.

"Yeah, and I could go with him...k-keep him out of trouble...y'know?"

The man beside her paused, the affront to his dignity momentarily overcoming his survival instinct, "Hey, whatta' ya mean, keep me out of trouble?"

It was all the distraction Xena needed.



Trussed up like a couple of prize chickens, Joxer and Gabrielle exchanged a rather forlorn glance. Neither could remember all the details of their capture, save that their friend and traveling companion had turned on them for no apparent reason. Just why they were in this predicament was a puzzle, but the look on Xena's face as she inspected her handiwork didn't give either of them much confidence.

She knelt down to gaze at each of them and smirked as both rather vainly attempted to speak around their gags. Giving the ropes on each a final tug, Xena grinned, stood and crossed to the barn's massive doors. With a grunt of satisfaction she slid the large beam into place, effectively locking her captives in, and the rest of the world out. Watching her with wide, round eyes, both prisoners gulped as best they could with a mouthful of fabric and attempted to scoot as far away from her as possible. "Now I'm sure you're wondering what's going on..." The warrior's voice was deceptively light, as she turned to face them again. "I could take the time to explain to you how the same day has been repeating for me, over and over, how no matter what I do I can't seem to escape this crummy town, how every morning I wake up to that goddamn rooster in this same fucking barn...But really, would it do any good? No, it wouldn't, and you know how I know that? 'Cause I've explained it to you two every single fucking day and no matter how I put it, no matter what proof I have, you still think I'm nuts. So let's just go with that explanation for now, I've lost my ever lovin' mind and you're in my power. Now the question is, what am I planning to do with you?

"You're probably thinking, 'Is she going to kill us?', which I have to admit is a reasonable question under the circumstances. Believe me, though, killing you isn't what I have in mind. I don't want you to be scared...worried, but not scared." She ambled back over to the two, knelt at their feet, then slowly crawled up between them. "Are you worried?"

Two heads bobbed vigorously in response and she chuckled. "Good...very good. Now, Gabrielle, I'm going to take your gag off. You can scream or yell at me if you want to, but in a couple of minutes I don't think you're going to want to. Just ask yourself something..." pausing to move her hands up to the material in the young bard's mouth Xena's eyes locked with hers, "...do you trust me?"

The gag came off to much sputtering and a cough or two before Gabrielle finally managed, "Of course I trust you, Xena, but what is all this..."

Her friend smiled, a warm, loving smile that made Gabby's insides tie themselves up in knots. "You wouldn't believe me even if I explained it to you. But I've decided to do something I've never had the guts to do before. I can only do it now because I know you won't remember it tomorrow."

"You're afraid of something? Xena, what is it, what are you afraid of?"

"This..." The word came out as the softest of sighs as Xena lowered herself down to claim her beautiful bard's lips. She felt as if she were falling from a great height, with only that kiss to keep her fragile soul from shattering into a million pieces. Gabrielle tensed beneath her, her breath catching with surprise. The warrior almost pulled away, almost, but the taste of that exquisite mouth egged her on and she pressed even closer. It took a full second or two to realize that what had been frozen shock was suddenly becoming enthusiastic encouragement. Gabrielle's lithe tongue met hers and flicked her teeth and palate playfully. She forgot everything in that second, all that existed was the Elysium of her bard's mouth and the heat where their bodies touched.

A soft moan brought the warrior back, not the sound of passionate acquiescence she'd hoped for, but that of complete despair. Pulling away from Gabrielle, the warrior dragged her eyes over to her other captive. His head was turned as far from the two as he could manage. As tightly bound as he was, Joxer tried in vain to ignore what was happening just a few inches away. Reaching over, Xena tugged his gag free and murmured, "Look at me, Joxer."

He shook his head and kept his eyes averted. "I said, look at me, Joxer," she repeated, touching his chin gently and turning him to face her. Those infinitely dark eyes gazed up at her so full of misery she thought her heart might well break. Elysium to one side, Tartarus to the other...that would never do. "I'm sorry about that, Joxer, it was thoughtless of me, I didn't mean to hurt you...I...I know how you feel about Gabrielle..."

"How he feels about..." the bard gazed from one of her companions to the other, a myriad of emotions flitting one after the other across her expressive face. "Oh....Oh!"

Joxer looked like he'd be forever grateful if Hades would just claim him now. There simply wasn't a word invented that could begin to describe his humiliation. Xena frowned; she was losing the mood she'd just begun to establish. Something had to be done, immediately. Before anyone in the barn knew what was happening, Xena leaned over to lay claim to his lips as well. He actually managed a small squeak before his body gave in to the inevitable. She'd kissed him before, though pretending to be Meg at the time, and had been pleasantly surprised by the experience. If there was one thing Joxer was good at it was using his mouth, and Xena was determined to find out just how good. Pulling away long enough for both of them to catch their respective breaths, the warrior grinned and purred, "You're pretty good at that...Meg been giving you lessons?"

His cream-like skin flushed with both embarrassment and the heady rush of Xena's kiss. "Why did you...I mean not that I didn't like it...'cause, well, I did, but why did you just...?"

"It's all part of the plan, Joxer, all part of the plan. But there's a lot more in store for you, for both of you, if you're willing. If you say the word now I'll cut you loose and we'll never mention this again. But I promise you if you'll just trust me, I'll make it worth your while."

Gabrielle, a little annoyed at being ignored, quipped, "So are you going to share this plan with us or do you just intend to kiss us senseless all day?"

Blue eyes met brown and Joxer managed a weak smile. "I'm in if she is."

"You won't regret it, I'm going to do things to both of you, things you've never even dreamed possible. I'm going to explore you, each of you, discover precisely what makes you tick, what spots need to be nibbled, where just a lick will do. I'm going to make you squirm and buck and writhe...and then you're going to do it to me."

"That's the plan?" Gabby quipped with a playfully quirked eyebrow.

"That's the plan," Xena returned, mirroring her expression.

"Good plan," Joxer intoned, his smile widening.

Xena smirked lightly in satisfaction at Joxer's eager response, and the equally enthusiastic glimmer in Gabrielle's eyes. She was pleased to know her instincts hadn't been off, that her two friends might indeed enjoy a little walk on the kinky side if the situation presented itself--and a little direct persuasion was used, of course. And if things didn't end up working out, well, no one but she would have to live with the memory after today. All in all, it was a much more interesting challenge than the one she'd been banging her head (and others' heads) over for the past few days--past few todays--oh to Tartarus with it, none of that was important right now. No, right now she simply had a very good feeling that there would be few if any regrets on anyone's part come the end of this particular today.

"What about these ropes?" Gabrielle asked, looking hopeful at the prospect of freedom.

Xena pondered for a moment, then shook her head. "I think they'd better stay...for now...just to be on the safe side. Wouldn't want things to get out of control, now, would we?"

Gabrielle appeared a little disappointed but Joxer's grin stayed firmly in place. So he enjoys a little bondage, does he? Xena mused. That was something she'd have to remember. I wonder what else Meg's been giving him lessons in... Xena had to admit that her companions' current helpless state was definitely a bit of a turn on for her as well.

"All right then...now that we understand the plan and we're all agreed..." Xena shifted closer to Gabrielle again, reaching out and letting her fingers slowly trail through the bard's golden hair as she gazed down into her bright expectant eyes. How many times had she looked into those eyes, wishing and wanting to see that spark of desire which was now so evident, so strong and fiery it seemed less a spark and more a volcanic eruption. The warrior could feel herself growing wet with anticipation, the ache between her legs growing fast, but she tried to force down her own desires to be touched and pleasured and to first serve her companions instead. She wanted to make sure neither of them would be in any mood to leave this place for the rest of the day.

Gabrielle parted her rosy lips slightly, titling her chin upwards as she looked to Xena, obviously waiting for another kiss. Leaning in to meet that sweet eager mouth, Xena wondered idly why it had taken her so long to try to use this repeating-day phenomena to her advantage. Sometimes she just got herself too...focused. But all work and no play, she had to remind herself now and again, makes for one dull and horny warrior. After giving her tongue ample time to explore the warm, delicious depths of Gabrielle's mouth, Xena gently released her, lips moving slowly down to the underside of her chin, caressing and kissing her soft neck. She was determined to learn every curve of this body in intimate detail, and what her mouth couldn't easily reach, she used her hands to investigate instead.

Gabrielle let out a deep groan and arched back into Xena's strong arms, straining at the ropes holding her arms and legs restrained. Her mind was barely processing what was happening, but her body knew exactly how to respond. She ached to have her hands released from their ties, leaving them free to touch and explore and caress, to mirror everything Xena was doing to her. Her most secret, believed impossible fantasy was coming true and it was nearly too much for her to handle. "Oh, Xena..." she sighed in delicious agony as the warrior princess' teeth nibbled playfully at the sensitive flesh of her neck, then traced upwards towards her earlobe. She didn't know how much more of this she could take, but she knew perfectly well that Xena was only getting started...

Meanwhile, Joxer simply couldn't believe what was going on right before his eyes. Am I dreaming? he mused idly, his initial horror at seeing Xena kiss his beloved Gabrielle having now faded past a strange curiosity at this point to truly...stimulating...voyeuristic enjoyment. Well, If I am dreaming, here's hoping I don't wake up anytime soon. He didn't know what was turning him on more: being helplessly tied up and at Xena's complete mercy, or watching the two beautiful women going at it, unconcerned that he was witnessing their intimacy merely a foot or so away. His eyes widened as he saw Xena's hands moving lower down Gabrielle's body, from her shoulders to the ties that held the young woman's already minuscule top in place...

It was taking all of Xena's self-control not to simply reach for her Chakrum and slash the tightly-secured garment off Gabby's bosom, but she knew she'd not hear the end of it from Gabby for the rest of the day if she did so. It had taken her long enough to earn forgiveness for shrinking it accidentally that one day by washing it in that hot spring. Instead, she carefully teased the ties loose, grinning at Gabrielle's growing impatience at how long it was taking her, the young woman's squirms and whimpers, and also Joxer's totally evident interest in Xena's current endeavor. She'd get back to Joxer soon enough. But for right now...

Ah, free at last! Gabrielle exhaled deeply as the ties were completely loosened, and the top hung now only lightly over her breasts. Xena's hands roved over Gabrielle's bare stomach, slowly, terribly slowly, moving upwards, but never quite reaching the other's heaving chest.

Gabrielle couldn't stand it any longer. "Please..." she managed to whimper.

"What was that?" Xena asked wryly, though she'd heard the plea perfectly fine. "What do you want me to do. Tell me."

Gabrielle's need won over her modesty after a brief struggle, while Xena's hands refused to move. "I want...you to touch me...higher..."

"Like this...?" Xena's hands slid up under her breasts, cupping them lightly as she leaned in for another kiss, smothering the other woman's loud moans of pleasure. Xena massaged and squeezed and played with the soft, perfect mounds, eventually letting her thumbs brush over the sensitive nipples. They stiffened immediately, Gabrielle's whole body trembling in response to Xena's touch. Nudging the loosened garment back over Gabrielle's shoulders and halfway down her arms, Xena sighed and took a long moment to admire the beautiful sight before her and the heated state she'd been able to work Gabrielle into so easily.

"Hmmmm...you look like you need a time-out," Xena teased, knowing she too needed a break before she ended up bringing Gabrielle over the edge without really having a chance to enjoy her body properly. So for a change of pace, she turned her attentions back to Joxer, afraid that he might be feeling a little left out of the action.

The expression on his face, however, made her grin and realize Joxer was not suffering any real hardship at the moment. She hoped that later on Gabrielle would be relaxed enough to let Joxer pleasure her directly as she knew he would give anything to do. Xena didn't have any real objections to sharing. But for now...

She shifted over to Joxer and had her hands on him before he even realized it. Of course, the fact that his eyes had been glued to Gabby certainly had a lot to do with his lack of concentration on Xena. "Joxer..." she purred, lifting one hand to his cheek to turn his attention back towards her. Finding his lips once more, she marveled at the wonderful contrast of taste and feel presented by her two companions, both delicious and exciting in their own very different ways. It seemed Joxer's ineptitude on the battlefield did not carry over into ineptitude in sexual confrontations; oh no, Xena had to come to quite the contrary conclusion. His tongue darted hungrily into her mouth, challenging her, almost, to refuse him access. She didn't, but just to reinforce who exactly was in charge at the moment, she let her free hand rest against his inner thigh, let it creep upward until it brushed against the very solid presence between his legs. She squeezed playfully and he yelped, breaking the kiss in surprise.

"Impressive..." she drawled, allowing her hand to hover there for a moment longer, deciding she was definitely going to have fun playing with that. But later. No, for now she had other things to explore...

Without that damned ridiculous helmet, Xena would have to say Joxer was almost attractive. And she was sure he'd look much, much better without the armor. A mad grin breaking across her face, she threaded one strong hand securely into his hair, and leaning in to him, drew her dagger with the other hand. She could hear Gabrielle gasp and felt Joxer jerk with surprise under her hand. With a few clean strokes, Xena cut the leather straps across each shoulder, resulting in a sound like a wagon full of tin pots running over a rut in the road as the ridiculous armor sagged across his body.

"My armor!" Joxer protested. "It was custom made!"

Locking eyes with Joxer, Xena tugged at the ridiculous confection of metal and leather. With a teasing lick across his half-open mouth, Xena leaned away from Joxer and sheathed her dagger. "I promise, your armor will be fixed tomorrow." Xena didn't bother adding she wouldn't need to see an armorer for the job. This Tartarus-spawned curse would take care of that for her.

"Well...if you're sure..."

With slow, confident gestures, Xena pulled the various layers of protective outerwear from the young warrior's body, as he watched her intently. With a graceful sweep of her arm, she tossed each item of warrior's garb to the far reaches of the stable where it would clang or crash or thunk, depending on its construction. At last, Joxer was naked to the waist, wearing only a pair of ragged pants and raveled blue socks.

Tweaking first one flat male nipple, then the other, Xena watched as Joxer's blush rose. "He's cute when he blushes, isn't he, Gabrielle?"

Gabrielle gave a sound halfway between a gasp and a choke. "I never really thought about it, before, Xena." Xena could see the bard's nipples were still crinkled pink with arousal.

"Haven't you?" Xena inquired. "I know he's watched you, Gabrielle, and wondered how your smooth skin would taste, imagined how he'd touch your breasts so tenderly, taking them in his mouth, perhaps tugging them with his teeth..." As she spoke, Xena dragged her fingernails lightly down Joxer's chest toward his waistband. His attention seemed divided between the lovely sight of Gabrielle, immovable under his gaze, and the sensual torture of Xena's erotic attentions. "He's wondered how you'd look, naked in the moonlight, smiling at him. He's imagined kneeling before you, worshipping you like the goddess, his hands gently holding your ass, his face hovering inches from your golden fleece..."

Joxer groaned, as Xena slipped a hand into the waistband of his trousers, and caressed his stomach under the fabric. "Haven't you, Joxer?"

Joxer's mouth was dry. His brain could barely process the words. "Ah..." was all he said.

"Haven't you, Joxer?" Xena tugged at the front of his pants, juggling the cargo they contained. Joxer managed a slow nod, his eyes closed in an unbearable combination of embarrassment and arousal. "I'll take that as a yes," Xena smirked.

Abandoning the would-be warrior, Xena shifted her attention back to Gabrielle. "Well, I know just how he feels, because I've imagined it, too."

"Xena..." Gabrielle's eyes glowed with emotion as the warrior princess bent to kiss her again. As their tongues locked in playful combat, Xena's hands swept downward from the bard's shoulders, pausing only briefly to caress sweetly curved breasts and trim waist, hovering for a moment at the tooled leather belt holding the woman's skirt around her hips. With gentle motions that seemed practiced, as they were a thousand times in her mind, Xena unfastened the belt, then gently tugged the fabric of Gabrielle's skirt away from the woman's shapely hips. Gabrielle wiggled slightly to help Xena remove the garment. With trembling fingers, the warrior caressed her friend 's smooth belly, expressing with her hands the love she had so long suppressed. Veering away from the mound of golden curls to caress the blond woman's rounded thighs, Xena inched herself down, pressing butterfly kisses to Gabrielle's face, her neck, her shoulder, her collarbone, as her hands followed the line of Gabrielle's thighs, caressing behind her knees. Xena was glad Gabrielle hadn't had time to put her boots on before the morning's struggle.

Xena paused in her ministrations, then turned to Joxer and said, somewhat shakily: "Is she everything you imagined?" Not waiting for a response from him, Xena continued kissing Gabrielle, at first gently laving her breasts with warm tongue strokes, then hungrily sucking at the pert points, taking as much of each breast into her mouth as she could until Gabrielle was softly moaning in pleasure. The sound sent another warm gush of liquid to Xena's crotch, and panting, she drew herself away from the contentment of this erotic suckling.

Xena's eyes were half-lidded in passion as she looked to Gabrielle. "Do you like this?"

With a soft sigh, Gabrielle managed a drugged sounding, "Ah...uh...yes. Yes." The feel of Xena's mouth on her body and the gentle tickling sweep of her long dark hair against her skin was building a fire under her skin that she had never felt quite so fiercely. Sure, she'd always imagined what it would be like to have Xena pay such loving attention to her, but the knowledge that Joxer was watching their play made it all the more arousing. She turned her head to see the gangly fellow watching them with a glazed expression. She tried to smile, but Xena's teeth were tugging on her nipple, and all she could manage was a sultry look and a sigh. Gabrielle could see his Adam's apple bobble in his throat as he gulped.

"Xena...I think you're forgetting something," Gabrielle insisted.

"What?" Xena continued to kiss her friend's creamy skin.

"Well, I'm naked. Joxer's...oooh..." Gabby paused as Xena's teeth teased her other nipple. "...almost naked," she continued. "Why do you still have your clothes on?"

With a final open-mouthed kiss to Gabrielle's left nipple, Xena moved away. "You want me naked?" she teased, smiling into her beloved friend's eyes.

"Yes, please," Gabrielle begged.

"All right." Xena bent to unlace her boots.

"Slowly!" Joxer blurted out.

Grinning at the rope bound man, Xena slowly stood, and stretched for her audience, her voluptuous body shifting under the armor she habitually wore. Leaving her boots on for the moment, Xena instead began to undo the fastenings holding her clothing in place. Slowly, she removed each item of concealment, watching the growing excitement in her friends' eyes. Soon she was wearing nothing but a dark brown shift that hinted at the feast of flesh beneath. Nipples strained against the fabric, tantalizingly obscured. With one bare foot Xena caressed the outside of Gabrielle's leg. "I think Joxer is now more clothed than either of us. What should we do about that Gabrielle?"

It was Gabrielle's turn to gulp nervously. "Strip him," she whispered.

With an arched eyebrow, Xena asked, "What did you say?"

His eyes shifting their attention nervously from Xena's barely clothed body to Gabrielle's delectably naked one, Joxer heard the reply clearly. "Take his clothes off, Xena. All of them. I want to see Joxer naked."

Kneeling in front of him, Joxer watched as Xena tugged his socks off, playfully pinching his toes in the process. "You didn't really like these pants anyway, right?" she said, fetching the sharp knife from amid her discarded clothing. At this point, Joxer didn't care if they wanted to shred all his clothes into tiny pieces for the birds to carry off as nest building material. Gabrielle, the most wonderful woman in the world wanted him naked, so naked he would be.

As much as he trusted Xena, Joxer still had to suppress an anxious chill as she inserted the cold and gleaming steel under the waistband of his trousers. With a practiced violence, she slashed the material along the front of his thigh, and tore the fabric the rest of the way. One leg now exposed, she repeated the process with the other leg, and pulled the remaining rag away from him. His cock sprang free, a proud warlord surrounded by a curling throng of dark hair.

"Oh, my!" Xena said. "You certainly have been holding out on us, Joxer."

"It's so..." Gabrielle couldn't finish the thought, her mouth had gone dry. She took a deep breath and could smell the musky scent of aroused male. Her dry mouth was suddenly flooded with saliva. She licked her lips with an uncoordinated tongue, and had to open her mouth to breathe, because suddenly she felt like she wasn't getting enough air. A little voice in her head started screaming, "What are you getting so worked up about? It's JOXER! What's the big...?" Then Joxer's eyes searched hers with hesitant desire, silencing the voice as though he'd bonked her on the head with a blunt object. "Xena says this day won't matter," Gabrielle convinced herself, "that we won't remember any of this tomorrow. I trust her. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Ohhhh," Joxer moaned, staring at the outline of Xena's breasts and following the movement of her pebbled nipples where they poked against the rough fabric. Hypnotized by the display of her arousal, his eyes tracked the faint jiggling movements of her flesh. In his mind, he whispered, "Forgive me, Gabrielle, but I find her attractive, too."

Struggling to reach Xena, Joxer's lips begged to kiss the pouting peak of her breast. Swinging the fabric-clad flesh before his lips, tauntingly, she didn't expect Joxer's sudden lunge toward her. Off-balanced, he fell face first into Xena's bosom, and taking advantage of his position, began to nuzzle the twin mounds of feminine flesh, sucking at her nipples through the thin cloth of her shift.

In an attempt to brace herself against the unexpected sensual onslaught, Xena cast her hand out for support. Her hand met only air, and she rocked back, landing somewhat awkwardly against Gabrielle's pliant body. Her arms flailed for a moment, encountering only loosely packed straw and slick flesh. With Gabrielle supporting her back, and Joxer pressing against her front, Xena was trapped in a sandwich, surrounded by bare skin.

"Uhm," Xena cleared her throat. "I don't want to hurt you. Let me get up. I have to finish undressing, remember?"

"I don't think so, Xena. I like you helpless like this." Playfully, the bard took a mouthful of Xena's hair between her teeth, and tugged gently, to demonstrate her power.

"And there's no reason you can't get naked from here!" Joxer's eyes gleamed. He smiled at Gabrielle. Xena could feel Gabrielle nod. Finding a weak spot in the stitching, Joxer tugged at Xena's dull garment with his teeth, ripping the fabric halfway to her navel.

"You didn't really like that shift, anyway, Xena, right?" Gabrielle teased her friend as Joxer resumed his playful assault on Xena's now naked breasts.

Xena growled playfully. "You want to play rough? Fine by me." Xena rolled Joxer onto his back, then finished ripping the shift from her body. Dusky nipples pointed first left, then right, as her breasts swayed from the motion of tossing the rag to the far corner of the stable. "Okay...who wants some?" Leaning over Joxer she asked, "You?"

Suddenly wary, Joxer could only gulp as Xena took his shoulders in her hands. Diving in for another deep kiss, Xena distracted him, so that he did not at first realize he was being moved.

Having carefully propped Joxer in a sitting position, Xena backed up to admire her handiwork. "Are you comfortable?" Joxer nodded. "Good." Xena turned back towards Gabrielle, and after spreading a blanket in the space in front of Joxer, lifted the bard onto the waiting blanket.

"Are you going to untie me now?" Gabrielle asked hopefully, as Xena inspected the knots holding her arms.

"Not yet. I think I want to show Joxer something, first," Gabrielle was not amused by the slow salacious grin that broke across her friend's face. "Yes, Joxer...are you watching?"

"I'm watching," Joxer croaked.

"Good." Xena began tracing feather light caresses around where the ropes bound Gabrielle's wrists. Slowly, she trailed her fingers down the sun-kissed skin of the bard's arms, and outlined each rib with increasingly confident strokes. Lying down next to Gabrielle, making sure Joxer could see both of them clearly, Xena pressed herself into the other woman's side, and let her breasts brush against Gabby's increasingly fevered skin. At Gabrielle's beseeching look, Xena bent over her friend for a languorous kiss, while her hands worked gentle magic.

Slowly, persistently, Xena's hands aroused every inch of the blond woman's body, stroking belly and thighs, and finally brushing the triangle of blond curls between her legs. Gabrielle's body was taut with arousal, and only Joxer's strangled moan could be heard over the harsh breathing of the two women. Lifting Gabrielle's knees, Xena loosened the ropes around her friend 's ankles enough so that she could spread the captive girl's legs like the wings of a butterfly.

Without protest, Gabrielle watched as Xena began gentle caresses up the inside of her legs, playing with the folds behind each silken knee, fingertips rubbing subtle spirals up the smooth pale flesh of her inner thigh. At last, the warrior woman probed the moist hollow of her groin with gentle fingers. Combing the golden hair away from the younger woman's moist secret with loving deliberation she spoke. "This, Joxer. This is what I wanted you to see."

Gabrielle closed her eyes. Never in a million years did she imagine she'd be tied up in a barn, her naked body ministered to by the capable hands of her best friend and studied lovingly by the equally rope bound Joxer, sitting a few heartbeats away. Then Xena's long, callused finger traced the inner petals of her femininity, and leaned on the tiny button of flesh above it, and Gabrielle decided thinking was overrated, as she surrendered to the amazing sensations Xena was stimulating.

Joxer watched the woman he loved arch against her bindings in wordless pleasure. Xena's dark hair curtained her expression from him, but he could see the absolute dedication with which she pleasured her friend. With sudden clear insight Joxer realized that Xena loved Gabrielle as much as he did. He wished suddenly that his hands were free, so that he could touch the two women, expressing all the emotion he felt, emotion that could not be put into words.

As Xena caressed the slippery folds of Gabrielle's sex with the thumb and fingers of one hand, the index finger of her other hand slid down to caress the tunnel to Gabrielle's womb. Another finger joined the first, as she smoothed the walls of the slick tunnel with her touch. Gabrielle was as sweetly responsive to her touch as she was to a kind word or a casual gesture of affection. Xena gloried in the power she had to bring such pleasure to the blond woman, and tried not to think what she would do without Gabrielle's dedicated companionship.

Gabrielle's breathing was punctuated with short, sharp gasps. "Xena, aaah, Xena please!" she moaned. Writhing under her friend's ministrations Gabrielle was nearing release, but Xena didn't want to rush anything. It was, after all, going to be a long day.

One last tickle inside the lovely blonde and Xena withdrew her fingers. "Oh Xena, please..." Gabrielle begged, but Xena had other ideas. Kneeling next to her beautiful captive Xena stared into the dilated pupils and brought her hand up to caress her cheek and run a finger across Gabrielle's trembling lower lip. Gabrielle lunged forward as much as her bonds allowed, trying to capture the finger in her mouth, but Xena's reflexes were too fast and she fell back with just a hint of her own juices on the tip of her tongue. Xena smirked at Gabrielle's discomfort. She raised the hand to her face and traced her fingers against her own mouth, then hungrily licked each finger in turn.

"Mummmm, luscious," she purred. Her eyebrow arched up as another idea struck. Running her damp hand down Gabrielle's stomach and slipping easily back into her dripping pussy, Xena bent over and gave her sweet side-kick a deep kiss, tongue plunging deep into her mouth as her fingers pumped into her once, twice...Gabrielle teetered on the brink, head back, eyes squeezed shut, but nothing, the fingers were gone, the tongue gone. "Wha...what? XENA?" she called opening her eyes to see Xena on her hands and knees in front of Joxer. Hand and knees actually since the hand so recently inside Gabrielle was now halfway down Joxer's throat as he frantically sucked at the essence of his beloved.

Once her fury at the interruption of her pleasure waned she turned her full attention on Joxer and Xena.

Xena couldn't remember when she had seen a man so aroused. Watching Xena pleasure Gabrielle and watching Gabrielle react had Joxer inflamed to the point where, when he saw Xena heading towards him holding out her hand shiny with Gabrielle's liquor, he opened his mouth, straining forward against his bonds. Gabrielle stared in amazement as Joxer slowly gave up Xena's fingers only to have them replaced with Xena's tongue as the two shared a steamy kiss born from their mutual passion for the sweet bard.

Gabrielle watched them together. She had seen Xena's gorgeous body on many occasions but never in such a state of arousal. Joxer was quite another story. He looked like a skinny idiot in the layers of "custom-made" armour. Too bad, she thought. Naked he's, he's rather impressive. Joxer's body was surprisingly well muscled, slim and pale, virtually hairless, but nicely defined. It looked rather inviting, smooth to the touch. And then there was...his erection. Who knew? she wondered.

Xena glanced over to see how Gabrielle was fairing and followed her gaze. "Pretty impressive, isn't he?" she growled. She traced zigzag patterns down his chest. His cock twitched as her hand approached it and he bucked as she traced one finger up one side around the tip and down the other. She bent down and inhaled Joxer's scent. "Mumm." Joxer shuddered, feeling her warm breath as she exhaled again. Xena reached down with one hand and gently cradled his balls, stroking them tenderly with her thumb. Gabrielle watched in amusement as Joxer threw his head back at the warrior's touch. Keeping eye contact with Gabrielle, Xena stuck out her tongue and licked slowly up the length of Joxer's erection. "Yummy," she said. "Want some?"

The little bard didn't realize it but her lips had parted and the tip of her tongue was peeking out between her teeth. "Uh-huh," was all she could utter.

"Sorry, still my turn," Xena teased her friend. "Maybe you'll get a chance later," she said, taking the florid head of Joxer's erection into her mouth and swirling her tongue around it a couple of times. She felt his testicles start to tighten up and pulled away. Xena had really hoped that she could make her friends' pleasure last but they were both so hot...

"Right," she exclaimed rolling over to face Gabrielle, "we'll have to untie your ankles..."

"Oh good," began Gabrielle, relieved.

"So let me grab another length of rope here..."

"What!?" she exclaimed.

Xena stood, completely unashamed of her nakedness and glanced around the barn. She picked up a pitchfork and drove it solidly into a bale near Gabrielle's leg. Untying the bard's ankles, she looped a length around her left ankle, running a hand lasciviously up the shapely leg to tickle the blond thatch of curls.

Joxer watched her moving purposefully, panting, wishing his hands were free so he could end his torment himself.

Xena drew her friend's legs gently apart. "You said you trust me, right? I won't tie you so tight that you can't move, but it'll be worth it, okay?"

Gabrielle looked into the loving smile hovering above her and relaxed a bit while suppressing a shudder. "Okay," she mouthed.

A minute later, Gabrielle wondered if she was going to be okay after all. Xena had tied her arms stretched apart above her head and one leg was attached by a short length to the pitchfork, the other had a loop of rope attached to an iron ring on a post a couple of feet to her right.

Xena grinned at her handiwork and threw a leg over Gabrielle, straddling her hips. "You're beautiful, you know," Xena purred.

Gabrielle looked up into the flushed face of her companion. "You too," was all she could mumble. She felt Xena's warmth over her stomach, then felt the tickling soft hairs stroking her belly as Xena moved above her.

"Please," she begged, "more."

Xena looked tenderly at her little captive. This was going better than she could have imagined. She had fantasized about touching Gabrielle, loving Gabrielle and now here she was begging for more. The words sent Xena into a frenzy, she kneaded her love's breasts, and rubbed her dripping opening against Gabrielle's stomach and pubic bone, craving stimulation. "No. Not yet," she mumbled shaking her head to clear her thoughts. Xena put her own lust on hold. It'll be worth it, she told herself, mind racing with images of some of the activities she had planned for the day.

Gabrielle lay squirming on the blanket, whining in protest at the sudden lack of Xena's attention to her body. Turning from the woman spread-eagled on the floor, Xena lifted Joxer to his feet by one arm, then lowered him to his knees between Gabrielle's legs. Gabrielle watched her maneuver him with interest, her mind racing. Last night she had forbade him from sleeping in the same barn as her, yet now she yearned for the touch of his mouth against her.

Joxer, his wrists still bound in front of him, managed to support himself on his elbows with his face inches from the golden curls of the woman he loved. He looked to her face for acceptance of what he was about to do and was surprised by the raw lust in her eyes.

"Yes, Joxer, please," she rasped at him.

Joxer was a little hesitant; he wanted her so badly, but he had always wanted it to be tender and loving with his sweet bard. He looked up again and saw Xena pulling a sweet pink nipple with her teeth as Gabrielle threw her head back and moaned. Xena caught his eye and winked and Joxer hesitated no more. He lowered his face and nuzzled the soft fair hair, inhaling deeply the scent of her arousal. With his arms pinned under his chest, he used his tongue to part her rosy folds. This must be what ambrosia tastes like, he thought to himself, delving ever deeper into her.

Gabrielle was overwhelmed with the sensations she was feeling. Xena was licking her breasts, tender one moment, roughly sucking her nipples the next. When Gabrielle tried to say something, Xena grabbed two handfuls of breast and kissed her hard on the mouth, swirling her tongue around and around until they broke off, gasping.

Joxer had found his way to his love's opening and was thrusting his tongue as far in as he could, lapping up her juices like his life depended on it. He lifted his head to take a deep breath then nuzzled back into the golden curls, licking and kissing until he reached the little nub that he'd been searching for. He squeezed the throbbing pleasure center between his lips and ran his tongue back and forth across it.

The combined stimulus from Xena and Joxer was more than Gabrielle could take. Her muscles tensed and her back arched off the blanket-covered straw. She threw her head back and opened her mouth but the shriek that started in her throat was muffled by Xena's mouth clamped over her own. Joxer finally raised his head in time to see Gabrielle slump limply, eyes closed, her nipples puckered little peaks, her breath coming in ragged gasps. It w